Today marked a milestone that will affect the rest of my life as I know it. I’ve agreed to get married before the end of 2015, and we’ve decided we want to start a family now. Now, before he moves away for a few months to work with Disney. I realize that I’ve set myself up for one ultra crazy, unpredictable roller coaster. But, roller coasters are exciting, and they’re always fun in the end.
We officially, “tried” to make a baby today. Even though we haven’t used protection in the past month, today we consciously, attempted to get pregnant. I know there is only a 10% chance of it actually working today, but I can’t stop myself from hoping. I went into super obsessive mode and made a huge amazon wish list. And started looking into houses to buy, and cars to buy, and decided on names. And I feel like a crazy person for going so deep into it. I just really, really, really, want a baby, and I can’t stop this.
I’m going to try and keep my composure and not actually start buying things, or over thinking anything. But this overwhelming desire I have is almost too much to control.